How I say things…

By Poetri

 

 

Ever since I can remember on most days,

there has been a mysterious reaction

yelling deep down in the bottom of my soul.

It hollers, kicks and screams causing a fuss

and disrupting the normal activity of the other body parts.

The commotion often reaches to the high offices of my brain

and suddenly when I speak I sound strange.

 

It took me a minute to understand this.

I wondered why folks looked at me with confusion in their eyes.

I often felt like I was in another galaxy where my

customs were not the customs of this world.

Maybe there is some kind of mistake

and I was born on the wrong planet. 

And my simple sayings of “Hello” and “How are you”

just didn’t click with these people, so most would just walk on by,

maybe even laugh or feel sorry for this crazy looking guy

with four braids in his head and who spoke another language.

I mean, after all…who talks to strangers?

 

So, to fit in with the crowd and to keep up with the Jones,

I allowed negativity to enter through gateways that I left unlocked.

And quickly WHO LET THE DOGS OUT became a theme,

as the obscene would flow freely in and out of my mouth.

And finally people understood what I was talking about.

I became comfortable lying about,

my eyes became accustomed to lusting out.

If you piss me off, my tongue would curse you out.

I could have conversations easily and even throw in the proper liguo,

Even took up rapping for a second.

Yea, finally now I was part of this world.

 

I hushed the mysterious reaction burning in the caves

of my character every chance I got.

But it kept bubbling and moving inside of me.

It seemed like it was telling me that

even though I lived in this world, I was not of this world.

It started coming back slowly and every so often I would speak that same strangeness that I had learned to walk away from.

People started looking at me the way they used to look at me.

Not only was I losing my cool, but I had gone completely loco.

And talking this other language that no one could understand, again.

  

I apologized to myself for thinking the thoughts that I was thinking.

I mean, who in this world actually cares about others.

I started saying sorry for being too happy about certain things.

Just calm down, it ain’t cool being all giddy all the time.

I started apologizing for being too polite.

That is only in the movies, real people ain’t like that.

Then I would apologize for apologizing

so much that I got sick of saying I’m sorry. 
I gave up on trying to fight it.

I was tired of explaining why I did the things I did.

This is who I was.  This is how I walk.  This is how I spoke.

I can’t explain the reasoning to normal people,

You just have to excuse me if I sound a little too happy,

sometimes weird or maybe even deranged,

but praise is the way I say things.

 

There is a choir who is singing and clapping on the inside.

They are so loud and overwhelming, I can’t keep them to myself.

A Pastor is cooking some good old fashion GOOD NEWS

in pits the of my heart,  and when I smell it, I can’t help but to smile.

So excuse me if I’m loud and always seem a little excited

and when I speak maybe sound a bit scatterbrained

I’ve learned that this is who I am and praise is the way I say things.

Bless me indeed and enlarge my territory.  Keep your hands on me and keep me from my enemies so that I may cause no pain.

Keep It Natural.