I feel like I have to put a video or a picture or something to start off every last one of my journals. What is this? Is it like some kind of advertisement, that I feel like I must show you? It is me eating a fricken cake...what is that supposed to mean? Are they the previews before you watch the movie...the commercial before your favorite TV show comes on? WHAT!?
Well, this time it is me (Wait a minute, it's always me.) celebrating a very special moment in history. Yes, boys and girls it was my burfday last year and that year is coming around again and so is my 21st burfday. What grown man would still walk around saying BURFDAY? I must be young if I still talk like that. And young I am. I am sorta like WILL. I AM. Matter of fact, back in the day, when I used to get my rap on...folks used to call me YOUNG. I AM. But then Will came out and I decided to do away with that. I didn't want anyone to confuse us. Then people just started calling me JERK. But that is another story for another time.
Yes, starting on SUNDAY, October 21'st, I will be celebrating my BURFDAY WEEK. I don't just do the whole one day thing...hahaha...that is lame. And I don't even use the word lame. But when I am talking about BURFDAYS...lame is the perfect word to use, when you only celebrate only for ONE DAY. I mean, I know my mom was celebrating AT LEAST a whole week for the anticipation of my arrival. I would feel like I am cheating HER if I didn't do this. And I am not about to cheat my mother. So, we will begin the festivities starting Sunday with church service, I will be running up and down the church aisles singing halleluyah. Then Tuesday is The Lounge...and yes, I will be celebrating there. Then Wednesday, I have a major gig at the LA COMEDY FESTIVAL. So, I will have to interrupt the show so everyone can sing to me. Cause...well...because it is my BURF WEEK. Duh!!! And then let's see...what is next...oh yea...the grand daddy of them all...THURSDAY. Yes, Thursday we will have the party of the century.
M Y O F F I C I A L B U R F D A Y P A R T Y
It is held every year at SPOKEN FUNK. OMG! Last year's party was off the chains. And this year, I have no reason to believe that it won't be the same. And since I am rhyming a little bit...I am positive...it won't be lame. Then Friday I will prepare myself cause SATURDAY is the actual day. I know you can't believe it...yes, Saturday is the actual NATIONAL HOLIDAY...MY BURFDAY. Yay!
Now that I have explained my week to you all. I pray and trust that you will act accordingly and choose the perfect gift for each day of the week. Sundays are only spiritual gifts...things like BIBLE's, spiritual books, like TD JAKES or something, Gospel CD's, you know. And then Mondays are reserved for monetary gifts like ummm...let's see...MONEY. And then TUESDAY is for Poetry related gifts, anything poetry related. And then Wednesday is free for all since it is hump day. Thursday are all old school funk gifts. And anything FUNKY...in honor of SPOKEN FUNK. Friday are party gifts and Saturdays are monetary again. You know you have to have two days when folks can just give money. Ya' heard?
So, now that we all understand the rules...I will look forward to your presents.
Bless me indeed and enlarge my territory. Keep your hands on me and keep me from my enemies so that I may cause no pain. Halleluyah.
Keep it natural.